paranoid insomniac

Sophomore Year

2009-07-05T07:48:00.000-07:00

This blog's getting old. The layout I mean, if only I was good enough to do something cool with it. Anyways, so yeah 2nd year in college. WOW. MADE IT =D wee~ Man! the schedule's so exhausting. I have 7-7 classes on Mondays and Wednesdays. But I do have a 4hr break, except on Wednesdays when I have PE class from 1-3 : Sweaty from basketball..GAH! I hate it : At least I don't have any Filipino subjects this year. July na, yey! 3 more months and it's sem break again. I miss BADLY my friends, thought this year was gonna be easier but it's not. I wish most of them didn't have summer classes coz I didn't get to see them as often as I'd like too this summer. I wish maui would go here ASAP..hahai..Her parents keep on changing their plans..haha..

Till here..coz I've to go to church today :]

one more week

2008-11-22T11:24:00.000-08:00

It's tough getting older..hahai..yeah one more week to my bday, first time ever without an ultra cool bash with lots of people cramping in my house. I still wish I could spend it back at home though, that would be totally awesome if I did.Now, what's a really really cool gift to ask for?? hmmmm..DSLR or Macbook?? I still need gift ideas..hahai..NEED HELP!! hahahaha.. XD

Davao :D

2008-10-13T16:23:00.000-07:00

Home is where the heart is..good to be back :)

FINALLY

2008-10-11T01:30:00.000-07:00

Hell week for the first sem is OVER!! yeah..party time.. XD Goin back to Davao tomorrow, so excited to go home. The long wait is finally over, gonna make the most of the little time I have there though. But kinda thinking about Mark, gonna miss him A LOT :] hahaha...15 days lang naman toh eh, kayang-kaya. :) When I get home todo gamit ng dsl, takte walang update-update sa blog for God knows how long maybe I'll change the skin on this thing if I can figure out the whole thing with the codes again. IF and only IF..hahahaha. :D

"If loving you is wrong, I don't want to be right."

9/11

2008-09-11T18:08:00.000-07:00

The weather's been gloomy lately. It's been raining here and there. Classes were "suspended" yesterday, suspended pa rin ba ang klase kapag yung tipong alas tres matapos klase mo tapos alas tres sinuspinde ang klase? hahaha..I had nothing to do today but sleep because ,just like any other thursday, shortened periods na naman..hahai..I've to study chemistry pa later, yey me :| Look on the bright side though, tomorrow's friday XD Going to my home away from home, idk what to do if I didn't have a family here I'd probably be dead by now. Hmmm..I think tita's going to Davao tomorrow though, si tito rin XD YES FREEDOM, so it's just me, 2 cousins and the new perky maid :| I hate perky..hahaha..Plans for the weekend then? uhhhh..idk, I thought about going to my friend's bday bash this saturday but if I go BAKA I'll be forced to drink which is NOT good. I gave up that life na, so yeah clean slate :p That's option no. 2, option no. 1 is stay at home and baby sit and spend more time with him :] I guess option no. 1 is A LOT BETTER :] hahaha..BUT, yes there's a but, I think I need to loosen up sometimes though and have fun with my peers the pressure's been tough here. Many are counting on me to be no. 1, hell I'm counting on me to be no. 1! Two options, one choice. I'll think it over in my dreams later..hahaha.. :p

how long have i been away?

2008-09-05T06:20:00.000-07:00

OMG! wtf?? I've been gone for toooooooo long!!! damn, July was my last entry on this thing??! Lots have happened since then it'll take forever to write them down though. I don't have all night..hahaha..I just got my weroam today! XD yey..hmm..so one more month and it's hello Davao again..awww i miss my family and friends there. Been here for 3 months na, wow I'm still alive! Can you believe it? hahaha..I don't know what else to say, I'll probably write again if I'm in the mood or something, ito muna for now. I missed blogging..A LOT! XD

Lang trip ngayon..

2008-07-23T09:05:00.000-07:00

When was the last I wrote on here? lol..can't remember..hahaha..I don't have classes this morning up till 2pm later, one hour lang 80 item quiz. Yeah i know what you're thinking, lucky me..hahaha..Tapos na ako mag study, ano pa ba dapat kong gawin? hahai..boredom nga naman ang nagtutulak sakin para sumulat ng blog entry..hahaha..How's life you ask? Ok lang, livin it up here in good ole Manila. Miss home, what's new? Nothing I guess, same old same old..Anyways, just wanted to write an entry..No one's online so i guess typing stuff down is the next best thing..hahaha.. XD

Orientation today..hahai..

2008-07-03T12:20:00.000-07:00

Shouldn't have classes this afternoon no thanks to orientation. Shit :| babalik pa ako sa school..noooooo! :c I've to walk back there again all the way to the 4th floor! hahai..buhay estudyante nga naman. Hopefully, I'll be at the dorm by 4 or 5. Got bored so wrote another entry..hmmmm..What else? Oh there's this annoying girl here in the dorm. She's so FC to everybody. :| There's a fine line between being friendly and being OVERLY friendly. Imagine, I was just minding my own business yesterday and then out of the blue she just talked to me. It was like an interview, I'm not fond of interviews when it is being done by someone you JUST MET..hahai..I'll keep you updated about life here.

"Being second is not good enough, it doesn't mean you beat a lot of people it means ONE person beat you. See? not good enough!"

ano ba??!

2008-06-23T17:47:00.000-07:00

I'm dazed, confused, jaded, perplexed, disoriented, mixed up when it comes to you. What hell? I thought I got past this. Uhhhhh...I don't know what to feel or say when I'm around you. The thing that happened a while ago, was it just a dream? IDK. Everything happened so fast. That was a shocker! uhhh..I didn't think you had the guts to say it, I guess you do now. But still I don't know what to do with what you said. Uhhhh.. :|

roach infested :|

2008-06-19T16:14:00.000-07:00

WTF??!! The dorm is roach infested :| uhhhh..I killed 3 roaches in the last 10 minutes..ewww..Now the germs are on my precious havaianas. noooo!! :c I think roach goo is also on my laptop charger wire. Must kill all roaches! Fcuk! I need to clean my screen cloth, I used it to wipe the goo away. I'll be bathing in alcohol when I get up my room. Good thing sa lobby lang marami. I don't why there are a lot of them today. I just usually see one or two everyday. Must be because of the rain..hahai..Oh, I just saw baha near the school. hahaha.At least I had an early dismissal today :D So, no baha for me...for now..hahaha..hmmm..The rain here is different, it doesn't have a cool breezy feel to it like the ones in Davao. Speaking of Davao, I heard that it's flooding and classes got canceled! You guys are so lucky!! huhu :| I wonder what my friends are up to? Just wish I could see them. :) hahai.. :)

first week: alone

2008-06-16T15:47:00.000-07:00

I can't believe I made it through one week here in Manila, ALONE. I was certain I'd lose my mind in 3 days of independence..hahaha..So far I've learned to do things on my own like clean my room, I've 3 dorm mates mind you, pile my clothes NEATLY, wake up at 5:30am etc. Never have I imagined I'd be doing all that stuff..hahaha..I guess being here's been one of the best decisions I've made after all. I know a lot of people back at home think I won't survive living here for more than month, I'm gonna prove them all wrong. Everyday is just routine, it's up to me whether I want to follow it or not. I don't know why I never even tried doing all these things while I was in Davao. All I did there was do what I want when I want. Here, life is entirely different. I'm not the spoiled "rich kid"(quote &quote), I'm not the overly dependent daughter, I'm not the boss. I'm just "me" here, plain and simple.

I rode a jeep last Saturday to go to Tita Gem's place. Truth is, I was scared as HELL! hahaha..But I made it alive, that's what counts. That was 3 rides all in all..hahai..Yeah it was tiring but it was worth it. :) If I were at home I'd just be like, I want to go here and there and wherever you know? And I'd have a 24/7 driver IF I wanted to! I do miss having someone drive me around town..hahaha..But I'm learning here, that's what's fun :) I'm still worried of getting robbed, abducted or whatever. Heard some scary stories from my room mates and friends. :| Nothing like that has happened, so far. yey me! XD hmmm..right, I've been budgeting--> this word has never ever been in my vocabulary until now..gaaahhh!!! hahaha..Pero ok lang, but I still want a 24-hour bank aka parents' wallets..hahaha..Rain, my brother, said my parents are way worried and miss me..hahaha..They thought I'd miss them first..hahaha.. not..hahaha..Miss ko naman sila pero mas grabe ata yung drama ng pagka miss nila sakin..hahaha..I can't wait till sem break, sana maka-uwi ako :)

uste. day one

2008-06-11T17:33:00.000-07:00

First day of college. Lingaw!!! hahaha..All the profs I met today were so nice. Panay joke silang lahat. Tae lang nga schedule ko pero ok na din yun kaysasa wala, diba? hahaha..Talked to some of my classmates, they were nice as well, I think my section is gonna be tight this year. But it's too early to tell, got to see what happens in the following months ;). This is such a big adjustment, I've to wake up at 5:30 every morning...hahai..If only I didn't take so long in the bathroom. Anyways, mabuti I met Sandra na. At least I know someone from Ateneo High na ka dorm ko. It's not hot today..I wonder why..hmmm..Oh yeah shit maxado kanina coz it was freakin hot in the morning and I forgot my hanky :| bummer! I'll bring it na tomorrow..hahaha..Before I go, here's a thought for you.

"A lot of fellows nowadays have a B.A., M.D., or Ph.D. Unfortunately, they don't have a J.O.B."

At the dorm

2008-06-09T16:26:00.000-07:00

Mom left this morning. I'm finally alone. The road to independence starts now..hahai..Anyways, I'm at the dorm and it's sooooo soooo hot. I wish a breeze would sweep by. Still having second thoughts on whether or not I'm going to the school mass tomorrow. Uhhhh...I'm too tired from unpacking my stuff I'll continue blabbing about life alone in the next few days. :)

a talk with my brother and sister

2008-06-05T11:59:00.000-07:00

Last day in Davao. :( I woke up at 6:30am today, which is so early on my clock..hahaha..Immediately went to the computer, had to check my emails and other stuff. My day started out pretty normal, sorta? hahaha..I caught my brother, kuya abok, online and had a chat with him coz my dad wanted new tennis shoes..again? he, kuya , just bought two new ones before this. Uhh..My father has the knack to exaggerate, he says he can't win games if he doesn't have new shoes on..hahaha..You should've heard him blab about his winning streak when I got back home from Manila weeks ago..hahaha..Anyways, my kuya bought a new car, a mini cooper o_O he calls it his "baby" I was like..You have a kid na??? hahaha..He said gaga daw ako..hahaha..Told him I'm gonna be in Manila tomorrow, gave me "advice" if you'd call it that. Wag raw mag tanga tanga doon pati magpataka..hahaha..I miss kuya though even if he always wrestles me to the ground and tickles me until I cry, that's what brother's are for I guess. He and ate are going on a trip to Costa Rica, they always go on trips when it's their birthday(June 22 same, not twins though) I wanted to come :| But school is starting so yeah no trip for me. Could've gone though, yeah right..hahaha..After we talked I emailed my sister, ate chica, also told her I'm going tomorrow. She's one of those people who have a really great outlook on life and I admire her for that. I'm gonna share her email with you. It reads:

ok..i hope you are not scared. if you are though its but normal. just face it and before you know it life happens and you will get the swing of things. just have a good head on top of your shoulder and trust your abilities. its going to be a big adjustment but you are a big girl now. remember if it does not work out manila, your course, school then its not too late to change your mind. the first year will be a gauge. its never too late to go for culinary arts if thats what you want. dont think of sayang coz first year is always prereq naman eh...im glad you emailed me..cant believe youre heading to college!!!ingat and let me know if you need any help..love ate

After reading it I was like T_T, yeah I cried..hahaha..It's really touching and I'm glad I have a sister like her who's always "there", my bro and sis are in the US I miss them badly at times I even remember crying on the phone when I was younger when we'd talk. I hope I don't make a fool of myself in Manila and let everyone down especially my dad. I also hope that things would work out for me and eventually I'd be a food technologist/ chef..hahaha..If the food tech thing doesn't work out though then I guess I've to go straight to culinary school, farther away from home though..hahaha..Doesn't matter, as long as I know I can still make it then I'd give it all I've got :)

4 days

2008-06-02T03:03:00.000-07:00

I've four days left in Davao. The past couple of days have been really hard and emotional. Every time I think about the 6th of June I get nervous and teary-eyed. I've had at least 2 sleepless nights these past couple of days and it kinda sucks that no one really cares that I'll be going away. I haven't heard from some of my friends whom I really feel connected and intact with. They barely even check on me to say hi or what's new with your life, simple things like that which really mean a lot. All I keep hearing is, "laag tayo before ka mag-alis bai ha" pero sigruo hanggang salita na lang muna yun sa ngayon. Yun na lang ba talaga ang mapapanghawakan ko sa mga taong tinatawag kong kaibigan? Ewan ko, ang hirap na pinapaasa ka sa wala mas mahirap yung naghihintay ka kahit meh pakiramdam ka na di matutuloy ang mga ganyang usapan. Eh ayaw ko naman na ako ang unang mag-yayaya sa kanila kasi di naman talaga ako yung klaseng tao na laging wala sa bahay. Sana na man eh kahit papaano naaalala rin nila ako kahit text lang man. Naiisip ko tuloy minsan na baka pag-alis ko eh makakalimutan lang nila ako, kagabi I prayed for them, yung mga tao sa buhay ko kasali na mga kaibigan ko, kahit minsan I feel that I don't have a place in their life I continue asking God to guide them, to help them make the right choices in life kasi di naman lagi na may mga taong tutulong sayo minsan nga eh sarili mo lang ang makakatulong sayo sa bawat problemang dumarating.

I'm the kind of person that always wanted to make a difference in people's lives even if they remember me for the insignificant things I do for them like when they ask me for favors or other stuff like that. I really like it when they seek me for help, gaya ng pagpapatutor yung mga ganyang bagay na kahit papaano ay makakatulong ako sa kanila kahit minsan eh wala na man akong hininging kapalit basta't wala akong ginagawa pati kung di ako tinatamad kahit anong bagay pa gustong hingiin ng mga kaibigan ko eh I do what I can as long as I can. Kaya nga that's what puzzles me eh, all my life I've been this person who's been trying to please her friends. In the past couple of years you can notice people especially people at school who I make libre to when they ask or even if they don't rin or who I drop off at this and that place or who ask me for favors because they think "I don't mind" or those who make utang tas di ako babayaran. Those things I do because I like doing them and some of the time really really pisses me off when I'm not in the mood. People don't notice that side though because they think ahhh si Jem bitaw yan ok lang and I don't tell them that it's not ok. Take for example the libre part and the utang part, those things are fairly good don't get me wrong kasi kung may pera ako di ko naman yun pinagdadamot kasi di ako gahamang pinalaki ng magulang ko sa pera. Lalo na kung ang isang tao ay tinuturing ko talaga na really close friend, why not diba?. Pero madami talagang abusado jan eh gaya na lang ni..hahai..nag isang taon na lang ay di pa ako mabayabayaran sa utang. And to think this debt is like play money for crying out loud. There's just so many people out there who think I'm rich, who think my family is rich when in truth were not. Just because we own a lot of cars and this fairly big house doesn't mean we have tons of money. Were like everyone else, we also have our financial issues like everyone else. So many people think it's ok to not pay me back for stuff they borrowed or not return stuff they borrowed because they think I don't need it back. They don't know for the past year or so there were times that I cry myself to sleep asking God to help my dad make enough money to pay our debts in time or to provide us with the basic necessities, asking God to help the spare parts business because there are really more tough times than good times in business. There are moments where we can't make money kasi yung mga customers di binabayaran utang nila in time or pinagtataguan kami kung minsan lugi ang tindahan lalo na ngayon lahat mahal tas kokonti na lang tauhan ni papa. Ang hirap ng buhay pero swerte pa rin kami kahit papaano kasi tutal nakakakain pa rin kami tatlong beses sa isang araw. Like last year, we were really lucky that we made money in time. Kasi ang lapit na talaga yung time na ibebenta na sana namin ang bahay. Nung kinuwento nga ng parents ko sakin di ako makatingin sa kanila kasi umiiyak na ako. Naaawa na nga ako kay papa eh kasi ako wala akong magawa para matulungan siya. As I grow older I realize every day that I need to grow up even if I don't want to.It's weird how a thought can absorb your emotions in a snap. Ang dami ko nang na itype ah..hahaha..where was I again? hahaha..oh right, so I think this whole leaving thing gave me a new perspective in life and that is do the best you can. I asked God last night to guide me through this whole thing, I don't want to be that kid who's lazy in class. I want to make my parents proud and to make them know that going to school away from home was the right choice and they weren't just wasting time and money sending me there. :)

Back to the friend thing though, uhhhh I really can get carried away with stuff sometimes..hahaha..I have ADD..hahaha..I just wish they make me feel like I've been part of who they are sometimes. Yun lang, too much to ask ba? hahaha..ewan :D hahaha..Anyhow, I started cleaning out my closet today. Kapoi mag sort out ng stuff na dapat palabhan tas ano ipack..uhhhh..hahaha..I'm not even done emptying the thing..hahaha..Mamaya na naman cguro..hahaha..Kapoi XD

Lomography

2008-05-26T11:24:00.000-07:00

Lomography @_@ It's so retro. I want to get in to it, problem is I don't know where to buy a lomo cam here in Davao...hahai..I guess I've to wait till I go to Manila...grrr...Anyways, I got interested with it since yesterday when I read this article on the Inquirer about lomomanila. They have an exhibit in High Street, I don't know till when though. At first, I was like what the hell is this shit? hahaha..Then after a couple of hours later Rain was reading the article and he explained to me what lomography was so I was like googling it up afterwards. Found useful videos on youtube, mostly slides of the pictures you can get from lomography. It really helped me understand it more. If only I had money with me right now.. *sigh* :| The fish eye thing is cool O_o, checked out some of the cams you can buy here in the RP. I still don't know the complicated words they use but I'll get the hang of it somehow. The cameras are not expensive unless you buy the LC-A one. If I happen to be in Makati one of these days I'll definitely check out team philippines on jupiter street, they're the only store I know that sells legit holgas, dianas etc. here. I'm not the expert on this whole lomo thing so check out team philippines' lomography site http://www.teammanila.com/lomoembassymanila/ I wish I can start with lomography now!! hahai..Till that time comes I guess I'll just be bitching about it in my head XD

Ordinary Day

2008-05-23T17:11:00.000-07:00

Today's pretty much ordinary. Nothing special happened, just stayed here at home. Hmmmm...I've two more weeks left in Davao. Excited kaya? Nah..I think next week would be a little less ordinary though . I'm guessin' I'd be out a lot, mostly with friends or buying stuff for my "new life" in Manila..hahai..Good thing is I've got something to do tomorrow. Going to the beach house with my Gaite family. I'm gonna meet two of my NEW nieces, they're both under 6 months..hahaha..I've a lot of nephews and nieces already, that makes 19 I think. Too many kids for a 16 year-old to handle :| That's pretty much all my thoughts for the day. I'll write whenever I think of something..hahaha.. :D

DONE! XD

2008-05-22T06:20:00.000-07:00

I'm done with the f***ing blog XD. It took me 3 hours..hahaha..3am-6am . Anyways, I guess I'll be giving Maui my blog address now. Hmmmm..one more confusing thing though, what the heck am I supposed to do with the Tag part? uhhhh..I'm gonna rest my brain for a sec..hahaha.. :p

samok

2008-05-22T03:39:00.000-07:00

The Korea thing got canceled. I'm staying here till the 6th :| grrrr I was so looking forward to going to Seoul on the 3rd. Turns out Dole is moving their finance meeting to the latter part of this year...hahai..I think they got paranoid about the earthquake thing that's been striking parts of China and they think that it'd hit Korea soon. uhhhhh..But anyways I'm looking on the bright side I guess, I get to spend more time here in Davao and also with my family and friends. Yeah, I think I didn't lose anything instead I got a new opportunity if you'd call it that? hahahaha..It's 4am..hahaha. wala lang.. XD

what i did today

2008-05-21T17:02:00.000-07:00

Larph called at 7am :| which is TOO EARLY for someone to call. Naputol tulog ko, yati ka larph..hahaha..anyways he was in town so he decided to tell me that we'd hang out today. So yeah even though I was lazy to get my ass up, i still did :| hahai..Had ZERO money today, good thing gi libre ko ni larph..hahaha..tnx larph..we went to the cat walk then to mcdo then to the cat walk again and saw some friends whom we said hi to..hahaha..Tas walang taxi eh di nag tricycle na lang kami yun pala closed pa yung sm..hahaha..We waited for 10 minutes outside :| Walked around sm for a bit to pass time. We did random stuff, mostly looking for new stuff to buy or will buy..hahaha..Ate at pizza hut, libre ni larph..ahahah..libre lahat..hahaha..And then I went home then went out ulit to the bank to sign something.. KAPOI mo lang..hahaha..Tas yun dito na lang sa house chat lang tas figuring out how to manipulate codes. IDK how other people do it, ang hirap :| Oh yeah I've to go back to the codes na, hahaha maui is waiting for me to finish so i can tell her my blog address..hahaha.. :p

Tres Canisius Reunion

2008-05-20T16:56:00.000-07:00

Went to Buda last saturday(may 17). I was with former classmates, my canisius family. Too bad not everyone was there. I sure do wish I could've spent that weekend with more people but hey I still had a blast. I just the love the country side, fresh air and all. Way different from what we have here in the city. Ang lamig dun, note to self bring clothes that will contrast the cold..hahaha..But even though the weather was cold the warmth of friendship made the climate tolerable. When we were there it was as if we lived for the moment and didn't have to worry about what tomorrow would bring or what the problems we had were. I wish we'd make it a yearly thing. I really miss my 3rd year section, not only that but also my other friends from high school..hahai..Back to the reunion, there was never really a dull moment we all uttered quips every now and then..hahaha..Even though the whole Buda thing is over it doesn't mean things have to be become ordinary again, the memories will always be with me and when the time comes when I think that I'm alone all I've to do is look back and think of that weekend. The funnest part must've been the sleepless night we had and the truck ride back home that left my hair oh so stiff! hahaha.. Last thing I've to say is when I was there I treasured every single waking moment. Even the simplest of things like the sunset, the weather, eating together etc. made all the difference this summer. I couldn't have spent that weekend with anyone else other than them, friends from tres canisius :) (ausa.vic.plang.ronald.dale.mika.darra.ace.noy.celine.chelsea) I hope next year madagdagan pa tayo di mabawasan :) Sa uulitin ulit bai ha? :)

maynila

2008-04-30T16:30:00.000-07:00

Na enroll na ako nung friday! :D yey. Nakita ko na din yung dorm ko. Ok naman siya hindi madumi, malapit lang sa school so yeah it's pretty much the normal dorm. Hahai..Uuwi pa ako balik ng Davao, kapoi man ui pero mas kapoi dito sa QC ang init!! errr...Stressed na ako dito, ang dami kong iniisip araw-araw. Yun tuloy, kahapon nag-yosi ako! uhhhh I hate myself for that. Ayaw ko nang matempt : I need to stop na. :| I hope Ronna gets here soon, I'm at trinoma waiting for her.

First Dorm :)

2008-04-12T17:41:00.000-07:00

I finally got a slot in a dorm along Espana. What's great is that it's just in front of the school I'll be attending this incoming school year. Two of my cousins stayed there when they had their reviews, I hope I have a good time there as much as they did. Di sana mawala mga gamit ko..hahaha..Yes, I'm referring to my dorm mates. I wonder what they would be like, would we all get along? Who knows, there's gonna four of us in a room : Ang gulo siguro niyan noh, apat na babae sa iisang kwarto! hahai..I really have to start cleaning up after myself already. When I do live alone, I want to change my attitude towards orderliness. Just think, if I don't start becoming tidy this year then how should I have a lax mind? hahaha..Back to the dorm, it's called Immaculate Conception Ladies Hall. It's run by nuns which means I can't make too much noise. Bummer! : Parang retreat all over toh ah!Hmmm..Mag ninja-ninja na naman ako..hahaha...Kasali na food, water and electricity sa bayad, sulit. yey! My prayers got answered na, I just have to do my part of the bargain. Study! :)

Graduation na!! :(

2008-04-04T20:19:00.000-07:00

So, today's finally the first part of graduation. We had our graduation mass, during which I can't help but think back to all things that have happened to me in this wonderful four-year journey, a while ago. What will I miss most about Ateneo High? Frankly, I don't know where to begin. But I am sure that what I'd miss most is the tiring day to day attendance in my classes. Yes, all those boring lectures which go on for hours and hours. Weird isn't it? You know why? It is because in all those tiresome classrooms I've known people whom have helped me become what I am today. Without those friends I've made in high school I wouldn't have grown as a person. In the entire four years that I have stayed there I've learned one thing and that is, high school is no fun without people sharing the fun with. How can we live a fruitful high school life if we didn't make any friends? The answer is, there would be no high school to enjoy and live out. There will not be any existing happy memories that you would treasure for the rest of your life. There would only be you and your diploma which in the end would be meaningless if you didn't go out of your shell and socialize.

Tomorrow's out graduation rites, exactly 12 hours away :( I want to graduate but I can't bear leaving the people whom I have been so attached to. There would be a myriad of emotions running through my veins tomorrow. I don't know what to feel or even think. I wish we still had classes, I wish we still had practice, I wish we had anything that would keep me in high school.. :( I'm gonna be in a new world after tomorrow's ceremony. COLLEGE..uhhhhh...I'm partly excited, as I've said in my past blog. But I don't know, I somehow don't want tomorrow or at least half of tomorrow to end. errr.. :| I was talking to my cousin before the mass started, she's gonna be an incoming HS freshman, I told her to treasure every single moment she'll have in high school whether they be good or bad because each experience you would go through has a purpose. I know I treasured mine. She's so lucky, I wish I can relive HS over again. Damn it! There should have been a grade 7 here just like in Manila! :| Para kahit papaano meron pang isang year. :( But even with one more year, HS will still have to end ;( Bukas na talaga, I can't believe this is happening so fast. Parang kahapon lang talaga 2004 :( Why hasn't time travel been invented yet? hahaha...I'll just have to make this summer the best that it can be. God only knows when I'm leaving. hahai..After tomorrow, it's gonna be hello Manila, hello new life ALONE, hello college and goodbye friends:( I might pull this off you know, won't I? *sigh* I hope college is as cool as everyone says it will be..hahai..I'll really really really miss every single friend I've made.

Anyways, kapoi na type. Here's all I can say to all graduates, batch 2008, of Ateneo High: We are at the pinnacle of our HS life, let's take a moment and remember all the good times we've spent in our beloved alma matter.As graduation is nearing and high school is coming to a close, I hope we can tell ourselves that we made it and that we deserve being where we are at. And also, I hope we take with us the Ignatian spirit wherever our new colleges may be, I hope we exhibit MAGIS in all that we do and I really wish we don't forget that we always have God to run to when we are burdened with fears and problems. Congratulations sa lahat, good luck sa college and sana we make the most out of our college life just like what we did in our high school one! Batch '08 I am proud to say that I've have been a part of you, soar high!!!!! ATENEO FOREVER!! XD AMDG :) XD

high school..almost over :|

2008-03-07T14:48:00.000-08:00

This has been the first time i've writtten in quite a while. I forgot i even had a blog until yesterday..hahahaha...but anyways yesterday was the LAST time I had to take my HS periodical tests. And what a relief it was, too bad we couldn't shout and go wild because the school admin is such a kill joy..grrr... :| But this is it, the big one, graduation. I'll surely miss HS, I made the best of friends here. People who I'd always consider to be part of who I am.

I'm leaving my home town for college. I've been wanting this since I was a freshman. To finally be away from my parents. I don't have to live in their shadow anymore. My dad has been making a big fuss about this, he thinks I'm leaving him for good! hahaha..hilarious..But there always comes a time in a teen's life where they know that they just have to move on and go out on the real world. People like my father, particularly my relatives, don't think it's a good idea for me to go to Manila. The main reason is because they think I can't fend for myself, which I can by the way. You see I'm one of those " spoiled rich kids," I don't think I am though but MANY people consider me to be which is so frustrating because they think I don't have survival instincts. It's hard to be stereo-typed by so many people who think that you can't be independent or do simple things like clean!!! :|

I'll be leaving so many people behind: my friends, parents, family and the good memories of HS and my childhood. I'll go out in to a world where I've only been partly introduced to. I passed many problems in the past, I hope I'm up to this. As much as I would like to go now, there is a part within me that's holding me back. I still don't want to grow up frankly, I still want to be in high school. College is fun, I know so many people say so, but it's a new world to me. Can I really do this? Can I really move out of my shell? *sigh*...Enough college talk, lol...I barely even got up on stage yet to get my diploma!! hahaha...Oh yeah before I go one more thing, I hope my friends won't ever forget me when I get back from the first year. That's one more thing I worry about, what if they don't treat me the same when I get back? errrrr...too much thinking about the future!! :| For now I'll just spend time with the people whom I'll leave behind.